In today’s culture we are taught to detest failure, to avoid it like a plague. Our society rewards success and punishes failure. We grow up feeling inadequate if and when our appetite for success is not ‘strong’ enough. We give no room for failure in our lives and extend no grace to those who fail. Hence, we navigate life with a debilitating fear of failure. This attitude is often transplanted into our relationship with God.  We assume God has no accommodations for failure and, for that reason, we find ourselves in a rather unhealthy competition for impeccability (imagine the number of Christian songs about ‘winning’ and ‘not losing’). But when our humanity –a humanity of flaws and failings ­­– rears its ugly head, we resign into a fatalistic laxity and lose sight of God’s relentless love. Some people might even put on a cloak of hypocrisy by working so hard to be perfect on the outside when, on the inside, they reek with fears and defeats. Personally, I tend to be quite suspicious of neatly-folded lives; I often wonder how and why some Christians purportedly lack the vocabulary of brokenness and struggle in their archive of experience. Don’t get me wrong, I am not trying to throw a shade at Christians with orderly lives. After all, apart from Jesus, there are people such as Daniel, Enoch, Job and Mary in the Bible who lived perfect lives and we should all emulate them. What I am saying, however, is that, most of the time, those Christians whom we think of as perfect Christians also have their inner struggles (they are just better at handling– or hiding– them than the rest of us). My definition of failure in this blogpost is all encompassing; it includes all our inadequacies, fears, unwilful sins, defeats, flaws, weaknesses, mistakes and so on.

I have found myself failing God over and over again (but, really, can anyone fail God?). Sometimes I fear that He might one day run out of patience for me. Sometimes I cry myself to sleep when I am reminded of that verse that states that God’s spirit “shall not always strive with man” (Genesis 6:3). However, in the midst of my knackering disillusionment, I stumbled on another scripture which, to a large extent, has made me realize that God is more patient with me than I am with myself: “even youths shall faint and be weary, and the young men shall UTTERLY FALL” (Isaiah 40:30).

Seriously? Is God saying that macho men of the spirit sometimes get crushed by the vicissitudes of life? That the strongest of us get tired at times? Yes, life sometimes feels like a lump in the throat and even the most resilient of us are unable to save their eyes from welling up with tears. The Psalmist recognizes this truth as he comes to terms with his innate proclivity for failure and defeat (Psalms 73:26). However, the story does not end here. As a Christian, failure is not the end of your story: “But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint” (Isaiah 40:31).

The point is not that we will not fail but that when we acknowledge our failures and rely on God for help (wait on the Lord), we receive a renewal of strength and a grace to face those failures. Therefore, when we find ourselves in a dark and broken place, that darkness becomes illuminated the moment we fix our gaze on Jesus. I guess this is the point Paul is trying to make when he declared that he’d rather boast in his infirmities and that he’d rather take pleasure in his reproaches (1 Corinthians 12:8-10). Of course, Paul is not saying that we should revel in our sins and defeats or that we should take the grace of God as a licence to sin. Instead, he seems to be saying that even when we encounter many defeats in our lives, we can still remain undefeated. He is saying that our failures can lead or redirect us to God. That is, our failures can teach us to be more dependent on God; our failures can humble us in a good way. In fact, it is not improbable that God uses our failures for our good (Romans 8:28).

Winston Churchill is right to have noted that “success is not final, failure is not fatal, it is the courage to continue that matters”. However, I would add that for a Christian, even failure is not final. Failure is not the end of our story (even though it may be a part of it). In the book of Proverbs, we are reminded that “the righteous man falls seven times and rises up again” (Proverbs 24:16). It sounds quite antithetical that a righteous man falls not just once but seven times. What makes a man righteous is not his infallibility but his ability to rise from the ashes of downfall and defeat. I would love to think that the story of the prodigal son is the story of a righteous man. His ability to run to his father after he was driven to his wits’ end is what qualifies him as a righteous man. Peter failed the Christ he proclaimed to love so dearly by denying Him publicly on three different occasions. No doubt, Peter, just like Judas, felt like a failure. But, unlike Judas, he sought for mercy from the same Christ he betrayed. Samson’s failure was catastrophic and shameful. But while in the cauldron of defeat, he sought the face of God and his last-minute victory turned out to be the most monumental of his entire life. Your failure can become the source of your testimony if you yield it to God in all honesty and genuine penitence.

Even the world is beginning to realise that by embracing one’s failures one might just be a step away from achieving victory.  There is now a Museum of Failures dedicated to celebrating the failures of great inventors such as James Dyson, Walt Disney, Henry Ford, Steve Jobs, Albert Einstein and Thomas Edison– all of whom experienced more failures than victories in their lives. Again, the point is not that we should justify or valorize our failures but that we see them as part of our becoming, as part of what makes us God’s masterpiece (Ephesians 2:10). Sometimes we feel like life is over for us because of a failed relationship/marriage or failed career or because we fail to meet certain societal or spiritual expectations. But that is not true. Our broken hearts can turn out to be a part of God’s plan. In fact, God loves to step in in those moments when we think we have come to the end of the rope. While God is obviously invested in our victory, He is also interested in our failures. He does not look away when we fail; instead, like the father of the prodigal son, He receives us in open arms, provides strength in our weakness, and creates a message out of our mess.

I sat by the window seat during a trip I made recently and I beheld, with wonder and admiration, the moving trees, the majestic cloud (whose colour I sadly couldn’t decipher because of my limited knowledge of chromatics), scantily dressed village kids hawking wares, older men drinking local wine under a thatched-roofed roadside pub, local chickens clucking away, bucks chasing nannies… all the amusingly beautiful– but sometimes pesky– chaos of day-to-day life in a rural area.

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I remember how I once, after a time of intense consecration and juvenile zeal, asked God in prayer to pluck away my eyes should I ever look lustfully at any woman. After all, the good book says we should do away with wayward body parts, and I wasn’t gonna let no eyes take away sweet paradise.  Well, I did look. He didn’t pluck. Glory to His exalted name. Also, looking back now, I thank Him for not giving me the tiniest voice in the world like I asked for as a kid. I really wanted to sing soprano better than Christy Lane, but I hadn’t thought of the consequences. How would anyone take a grown man who speaks in the 8^th Octave of Key C seriously? We all have those moments when we look back and thank Him for discarding our juvenile, unreasonable, sometimes idiotic requests.

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I once heard the story of a young lady who stepped out of her apartment with so much excitement, only to be harassed by a libidinous madman across the street. Filled to the brim with unfettered urges, the foul-smelling lunatic seized her and proceeded to defile her on the stony floor by the roadside. Stone, bricks, timber, were hauled at him by flustered passersby. He was punched, kicked and pulled by hefty men, but he endured all, till he made an end to pleasing himself.  Mentally damaged and unable to spend the rest of her life with the trauma and shame, the lady committed suicide some days after. I can imagine she prayed. I can imagine she screamed her lungs out for help to the great omnipotent God who obviously was present, as He is everywhere. In fact, I feel she really didn’t have to pray. If the ever-caring God (who sees the innermost thoughts of our hearts (Psalm 129) and knows our needs while we still think and before we ask (Matthew 6:8)) had intervened, not only would she be with us now, but He could have won Himself a loyal disciple. Now she’s dead, and probably in hell for killing herself. Yes, He has better plans and sees life from a dynamic, perfect perspective, but what is the logic behind not granting the desperate plea of a girl who was about to be raped?

I do not doubt God’s goodness. Or His fairness. But this is not going to be another of the numerous apologetics, so do not expect some “nevertheless, clap for Jesus” 12^th round knockout punch for the Lord at the end. This is because I, like many other Christians, struggle and are met with silence to prayer requests that are beyond valid, and we wonder with lumps in our throats why God’s interventions are confined to miracles which are by definition infrequent and not close to being enough, instead of more commonplace responses like we read in the Pentateuch.

It is both depressing and hilarious how some quickly run to cover up for God. We are told to shut up and deal with it. Every question is seen as unbelief and lack of faith. Some others are even categorized as flat-out heresies and can lead to your excommunication. We are told to be grateful for the air we breathe that is expensive, the clothes we wear, the food, friends and family, shelter and other abundant benefits. Yes indeed, God is faithful, kind and true, but He, by Himself, spoke the contents of John 16:24 and so we hold Him by His word (Psalm 138:2).

I read from a friend’s meditation shared on her WhatsApp status how trying to put our arms around something we were never designed to hold is a futile effort, and that a new life starts with confessing the truth: “There are some things in life I have no control over.” This is true and sounds soothing, but brings no comfort, and does nothing to assuage the poignant circumstances of life.

Jesus Himself said ask, and you’ll receive (Matthew 7:7). He implicates Himself further when he promised to do anything we ask in His name (John 14:14). Anything. That verse has probably done more harm than any other.

We begin to pose questions.

You said anything, “I only asked for a job, not anything extravagant, just something I can feed my aged parents with”.

“Is it too much to ask that you should heal my mum who has served you all her life?”

“Why did you say ‘ask anything’ and then refuse to intervene in my sister’s failing marriage after all the fasting and prayers?”

Believers needed new organs but died praying for it. Workers in church who cannot pay their rent, youths fervent for kingdom cause but penniless, jobless and broke. A woman struggling with her infant with spinal bifida, another Christian family burying their kids. Out of school children from families who never miss morning devotion.

Some promises are practically unfulfillable or at least very difficult to keep, like Herod’s (Matthew 6:23) and Ahasuerus’ (Esther 5:3), but you’d expect God’s promises to be exceptions. After all, He wasn’t coaxed into making them, why then aren’t we really seeing them fulfilled? At times one wonder if He made those vows in a desperate wooing attempt, like a man who uttered mighty impossible things to win the affection of a beautiful damsel. He needed to reconcile with His choicest creations so badly He was willing to say anything to make them love Him again. Perhaps like an overjoyed bloke, brain swimming in endorphins, who then made profligate assurances only to wake up sober the next day and lament an ill-considered pledge rashly made.

If He had said “ask anything in my name and I will seriously consider it”, everyone would have gone back to work. There would’ve been ten thousand less books and Philip Yancey might have been a carpenter, but He said do ask until your joy is full (John 16:24), and yet we’re left hanging and feeling confused, like a kid stranded in the marketplace.

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I have since learnt to accept my intellectual disability on so many mysterious spiritual matters, the subject of prayer being one of such. We live in a world riddled with mysteries, and it is futile to try to unravel the unravel-able. After all, is a mystery really a mystery if it is not mysterious?

I end this with a few stories, the first extracted from the book ”The Hungering Dark”  by Frederick Buechner:

”It is a peculiarly twentieth-century story, and it is almost too awful to tell: about a boy of twelve of thirteen who, in a fit of crazy anger and desperation, got hold of a gun somewhere and fired at his father, who died not right away but soon afterwards. When the authorities asked the boy why he had done it, he said it was because he could not stand his father, because his father demanded too much of him, because he was always after him, because he hated his father. And then later on, after he had been placed in a house of detention somewhere, a guard was walking down the corridor late one night when he heard sounds from the boy’s room, and he stopped to listen. The words that he heard the boy sobbing out in the dark were, “I want my father, I want my father”.”

No matter how much we feel flummoxed by His decisions, we still need God and we will be unfair to deny His love for mankind or how far He has gone on our behalf.

The other story is more recent, and much more personal.

A close relative of mine had been diagnosed with Non-Insulin Dependent Diabetes Mellitus for over 13 years now, and I, alongside many, have made intercessions to God for their healing. Recently (after 13+ years of incessant supplications!), I got a reply from heaven. The said relative would have died years ago from a fat-related disease condition had they not been diabetic. The disease ensured that excess and potentially dangerous fat stores accumulating in the internal organs were burned, hence prolonging their life. I had to apologize to God for the times I accused him of being snobbish concerning the request, and thank him for his kindness. What a nice thing to do! At that point, God seemed to me like a fine gentleman. But the truth is, whether or not He chose to respond (in this instance He did), He did the best thing, like he always does.  I wouldn’t have understood without the explanation. He didn’t have to explain. He just went ahead and did what He had to do. That’s it. That’s why He’s the boss.

Another story was told of a great man of God who died rather suddenly. The church wailed. It shouldn’t have been him. Aspersions were cast on the character of God and many stopped believing. But what really happened was a fulfillment of Isaiah 57 verse 1. There was an imminent quagmire that would have met him with great opprobrium, and led to his eternal ruin, and so God took him. Heaven’s court decided he had laboured too much and too hard to miss out on his reward, and called him home abruptly.

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One thing is sure. Our world is doomed. I feel God wants to make sure we don’t feel too much at home here. Didn’t Lazarus who was raised from the dead later die? Miracles are to show us that there is more. A teaser. A proof of better things to come. A peek behind the curtains of divinity, an appetizer to wet our appetites as we await our main course in heaven.

Why bother praying at all then? Simple, because Jesus prayed. The scripture is filled with instances where Jesus prayed publicly (John 11:38-44) and privately (Luke 4:1-2; 5:16), and the aftermath of His prayers (Matthew 14:13-21; 15: 29-39). Not only did He pray, He also command is to do the same (Luke 18:1), taught us how (Matthew 6:6, 9-13), how not (Matthew 6: 7-8), even made an 8-verse parable on it’s importance (Luke 18:1-8).

The disciples prayed and received the Holy Ghost (Acts 2:1-4), Moses, Joshua and Elijah prayed and subjugated the laws of nature (Exodus 14:21, Joshua 10:12-13, 1 Kings 17:1; 18:41-45), Solomon prayed his way into wisdom and prosperity (2 Chronicles 1:8-12), Esther into national security for the Jews (Esther 4:16), Nehemiah into leadership (Nehemiah 1:4-11), Paul and Silas prayed their way out of prison (Acts 16:24-34), and Dorcas was brought back to life (Acts 9:36-41). These are proofs that prayer works, and that those times the end results are unpleasant should not rule out when they bore fruits. That would be unfair and biased.

Jesus himself battled with unanswered prayers (Matthew 26:39; Luke 22:42). That is to me, a kind of consolation.

A perfect score on the answered prayers report card and a life devoid of pain and angst is no proof of a perfect Christian life, or else Christ, His disciples and the early apostles will be the chiefest of pagans. Or were they?

Author: Oluwafemi Dada

I was recently on phone with a potential landlord who had found me most likeable among all the people who enquired about his rental apartment. The tone of the conversation changed after I mentioned to him that I was a Christian. He told me he found Christians (not Christ) distasteful. He said he was once a devout Christian himself but now free-spirited. The next day he sent me a message that said that he had rented the apartment to someone else whose lifestyle he found more palatable. When and how did we get here? When did being a Christian become ‘distasteful’? Why do people distrust church people so much? Why do Christians sometimes find it hard to do business or trade with their fellow Christians? Why are Christians sometimes the worst critics of other Christians? I did a bit of searching and realized that my potential landlord might have suffered from what is commonly referred to as “church wounds”. I also found out that many anti-church people were once churchgoers and church lovers. How does one begin to explain this anomaly? How do we come to terms with the fact that there are thousands of people out there who have felt wounded or betrayed by the church? This is a difficult subject for me to write because I have never been wounded by the church––although I have been disappointed in a few church members a couple of times– and cannot pretend to know what it feels like. Having talked to a few friends about the subject, I realized it is a very serious matter which, most of the time, gets swept under the carpet for numerous reasons. Sometimes people who are hurt by the church fail to discuss it because they fear being labelled as rebels. Other times, when they try to raise the issue, they are further silenced because expressing their hurt may discourage others and may portray church leaders or church goers in a bad light. While many have come out of church wounds unscathed, others have left the church (and even died) without looking back. One of my friends whom I spoke to about this issue recounted how he hadn’t gone to church in months because he felt manipulated by church leadership. He talked about how he was looked down upon after he lost his job and how he felt suicidal as a result. Another friend spoke about seeing the worst in church people and how that deflated his confidence in people generally. Another friend told me about a man, a social media influencer who, today, is one of the strongest voices against the church. This man once loved the Lord but that love turned to bitterness after he was barred from marrying a girl (in church) because of his low economic status. As the story went, he impregnated the girl against the parents’ wishes. Even though he was wrong to have done so, he was shocked when he found out that the girl’s parents (who were church leaders) took her for an abortion. That was the moment he left the church and never returned.

While church wound is real, it is important to emphasize that it is not that taste of discomfort you felt when your pastor spoke the truth of God’s word which pricked your guilty conscience. It is also not the grievances you had after you were stopped from ministering in church because of an outright wrong or an inappropriate behavior. Church wounds run deep. I am talking about being savagely bullied and emotionally blackmailed by church people. I am writing about people who have been at the receiving end of high-class hypocrisy and unspeakable two-facedness from their church members. I am talking about people who were judged unfairly –or wrongly– and treated with an excruciating double standard. I am talking about people who were abandoned by the church at a time when they needed God the most. I am talking about people whose lives have been ruined under the rubrics of church legalities and blind religiosity. I am talking about people who, against their will, get dragged into messy church conflicts, people whose confidence have been betrayed by church politics. To such people, here is the truth: your decision to stop going to church makes logical sense. But here is another truth: if Jesus himself were to come back in disguise to the world today, he would most likely be rejected by the church. I know you hate churchy people, but I also know that you know, deep within you, that what has been done to you does not reflect what Jesus has done or would ever do to you.  And here is another truth: Jesus knows and feel your hurts. He desperately wants to heal your broken heart and bind your wounds (Psalm 147:3). But also, he wants you to obey Him and have faith in His words even in instances when obedience and faith don’t make logical sense. No matter what happens, Jesus does not want you “to forsake church gatherings” (Hebrews 10:25) – although I don’t think He is against a cautious church switching. I know unchurched Christianity has become the trend, but the truth is that Christianity finds expression and essence in community, in fellowshipping. As someone said, “when we call people to trust in Christ, we call them to join the family of God. Calling people to Jesus includes calling them to belong to Christ’s body”. Therefore, church attendance is an integral part of the Christian life. Because you still love the Lord and still wants to obey Him, I want to provide you with a few tips on how to deal with church wounds.

First of all, you need to understand that there is no perfect church, not on this earth. If you read Paul’s letter to the churches (in Rome, Ephesus, Corinth, Galatia), you’ll notice that he often reprimanded them for their multiple shortcomings. Even Paul himself suffered church wounds. At some point (2 Timothy 4:16), he felt abandoned by the church he helped to build. Also, if you read the letter to the seven churches in the Book of Revelations, you’ll realize that no church is perfect except, of course, for when we all become one congregation under the Lordship of Christ in heaven. When you have this understanding, you’ll become less likely to be wounded by the church. In addition, you need to know that when all is said and done, all those church members are still humans and are still capable of misjudging situations or mischaracterizing righteousness. You also need to understand that where people of God are gathered, even the devil can be present (Job 1:6). Therefore, not all church goers are heaven goers. The devil’s ultimate goal is not to drive you away from church people, his ultimate goal is to use your church wounds to drive you away from God. This is why you need to know whom you have believed (2 Timothy 1:12); it is why you need to guard your relationship with Christ diligently to such extent that even the worst of church behaviors would not be able to separate you from the Lord (Romans 8:35-39). When you look unto Jesus the author and finisher of your faith alone (and not your pastor or church elder), you would not be deterred by whatever anyone does to you. Also, when you are judged unfairly by the church, remember that the pharisees (the church of that time) misjudged Jesus too but, instead, Jesus chose to “entrust himself to the one who judges justly” (1 Peter 2:23). He ultimately forgave His arraigners even though they were underserving of His forgiveness (Colossians 3:13) – and so should you forgive those church members even when they have not asked for it. I know this is a tough thing to do, but it is important for you to heal from your church wounds. Always remember to talk directly to Jesus even when it is “His people” who are giving you such a hard time.

            II

It is important for us regular churchgoers to look inward and ask ourselves if we have contributed in one way or the other to wounding other churchgoers. This is an important question to ask because we are the church. The church is not a building, it is not an abstract, it is the people who go to church that make the church. Someone actually cautions that you should not “bother looking for a perfect church because if you ever find it, and join it, then it won’t be perfect anymore”. There is no perfect church because there are no perfect people. Therefore, there will always be offences and conflicts in the church but “woe unto whom him through whom they” happen (Luke 17:1). This is why it is important to ask ourselves if, in the most subtle way, we’ve been a wet blanket or stumbling block to another church member (Matthew 18:16). Speaking of stumbling blocks, Jesus condemned the Pharisees for travelling ‘over land and sea’ to gain one convert but also turning that convert into a candidate of hell. He condemned them for shutting the door of Heaven on people’s faces even when they themselves were not entering in (Matthew 23:13-15). This reprimand applies to the church today. Those who deliberately wound others–and make others leave the church– are themselves candidates of hell. My own prayer is for God to help me not to be that church member who takes pleasure in bringing people down or that church member who watches on when other church members are being wounded. We all need to go back to the basics. What is “the” church? And what purpose does it serve? The church is the body of Christ. It is also a congregation of believers who meet regularly to pray, worship and serve one another. The early church had an unbroken unity, they pulled and shared resources together. They were so Christ-like that people started calling them Christians (those like Christ). Isn’t it an amazing testimony that it was unbelievers who first called a group of believers by the name “Christians”? If we were to be named by unbelievers today, what would they name us churchgoers? And do you know that being “churchy”, according to most dictionaries, has become a negative thing? This needs to change because we know that the church is essential in the purpose of God. The church is supposed to be a place of safety, it is supposed to be a hospital for the broken. It is supposed to be a house of prayer, not a den of thieves and hypocrites (Matthew 21:13). As church people, we must do our best, with the help of the Holy Spirit, “to bear one another’s burdens and keep the unity of spirit in the bond of peace” (Ephesians 4:2, 3). Finally, despite the imperfections, God promises to build His church; He would never allow the gate of hell to prevail against it (Matthew 16:18). God loves his church very dearly– may we also find a place in our hearts to do the same.

Ravens.

I don’t know about you, but when I hear that word, the image that first comes to mind is a black, ugly-looking bird. Would I dare eat my sun-dried stockfish after it has been touched by a raven? No, never!  Even the English language despises this bird, because the word “rave” is derived from “raven”. When a group of people are described as “a group of ravens”, it simply means they are treacherous, unkind and conspiratorial.

Ravens are large all-black birds; they are wild scavengers– they feed on carrion, dead things and wastes. Their appearance is generally interpreted as a bad omen. Personally, the sight of a raven frightens me. Seeing a raven at night for me is a call to prayer, or a vigil even.

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However, I am beginning to understand differently. I am beginning to realise that as ugly as ravens appear, there is also something beautiful and endearing about them. The brain of a typical raven is among the largest of any bird species. This explains their impressive cognitive abilities which include imitation and intuition. Scientists observed about 15-30 categories of vocalization in ravens, most of which are used for social interaction

Interestingly, the raven was mentioned 12 times in the Bible. First was after the flood when Noah sent a raven out and expected it to return but it didn’t. Also in the new testament, Jesus tells a parable using a raven to show how people should rely on God for their daily needs (Luke 12:24). Also, in 1Kings 17: 4-6, God fed Elijah in the wilderness by sending ravens to bring him food. I would have thought that God would send a dove or any other good-looking bird, not a raven. There must have been a reason why God chose to send a raven and I am still trying to figure out that reason. But maybe we are the ones who see ugliness in ravens, maybe when God looks at the ravens, He only sees His beautiful creature.  What do you consider yourself to be? Or, better still, what do people see you as? If there is one thing I have learnt, it is that God uses the foolish things of this world to confound the wise and the weak things to confound the mighty (1 Cor. 1:27). His strength is made perfect in our weakness (2 Cor. 12:9). What people see as dirty and irritable in you, God can make it clean and desirable. What you see as broken pieces in your life, God can make it whole. What people have described as useless in you, God can make it useful.

Rebecca Oladele

The entire household of Abraham could not contain their joy when Rebekah’s pregnancy became public. God is indeed a good God who makes everything beautiful in its time. Prior to that moment, Isaac and Rebekah had waited for 20 years for the fruit of the womb. When Isaac could no longer bear to look at his wife’s hollow cheeks and despairing face, he made a desperate cry to God. He was confident in God’s ability to answer prayers because he had seen Him move in miraculous ways. As a child, he saw God provide a ram as his replacement on the altar of sacrifice. He also knew that his father Abraham was 100 years old when he (Isaac) was born. So, that night when he cried in agony to God about Rebekah’s childlessness, he knew God had heard him. And, indeed, God heard and answered his prayer as Rebekah immediately had a bun in the oven. However, from her first to her last trimester, Rebekah had troubles standing upright or sitting still because of the incessant pushes and kicks she felt in her belly. She was so afraid for her life, so afraid that she might die. She took the matter to the Lord in prayer. “Why is this happening to me, Lord”, she asked. There and then, the Lord revealed to her that she was having a set of twins and that the pushes and kicks in her stomach were a sign that the twins would constantly be at loggerheads. The Lord told her many things, but the one that baffled her the most was that the older of the twins would serve the younger.

The twins could not have staged a more dramatic arrival to the world. The first boy came out looking so red. He was so hairy that, at first, the midwife thought he was covered in a fur coat. Because of this excessive hairiness, they immediately named him Esau (although he would later be known as Edom, the Hebrew word for “red”). The joy and surprise of Esau’s arrival had not even percolated when the second boy came out grabbing Esau’s heel with his hands. Because of his massive supplanting tendencies, they named the second boy Jacob.  As the boys grew up, Isaac did not hide the fact that Esau was his favourite. The young boy (Esau) was very confident, outspoken and outdoorsy. His archery skills made him stand out; in fact, he turned out to be the best hunter in town. Isaac would sometimes go hunting with him and would marvel at the young boy’s game. Esau didn’t have to strive for Isaac’s attention, but Jacob had to. Hence, the twins grew up with an intense sibling rivalry. Unlike Esau, looks were not Jacob’s selling point. He detested the fact that his brother stole the show everywhere they went– not that he went out that much anyway. He was introverted; he was a beta male.  While his brother, Esau, would more likely be described as “comely”, Jacob was the kind of guy who would be described as ‘homely’. His only consolation was his mother’s love. He knew his mother loved him very dearly, more than she did Esau. Perhaps he grew on his mother because he was always at home with her whenever Isaac and Esau went to the field or because mothers, generally, tend to gravitate towards the quiet and sensitive child. Perhaps Jacob got his exceptional culinary skills from his mother. It was not surprising then that on the day when his destiny would change forever, he was in the kitchen cooking red lentil stew. On that same day, when Esau returned from the field following a hunting spree, the tantalizing aroma of Jacob’s stew ambushed his olfactory lobes. At first, he had thought he was only imagining the aroma because of his intense hunger and exhaustion. “No food can smell that good”, he told himself as he dropped his hunting equipment at the front door and entered the house, still under the spell of a smell. The smell became stronger and irresistible as he entered the house and, like a robot, allowed himself to be led into the kitchen where the smell emanated from.

“The chef, what are you cooking this time?”, he asked Jacob in that patronizing tone he’d always used to address him.

“I’m cooking stew, red lentil stew”, Jacob responded in his usual quiet and unassuming manner. He saw right through his brother. He read through his impulses and saw his salivation.  He knew he wanted the stew so badly. He was ready to take advantage of the situation, to pounce on Esau’s moment of laxity. All these years, he had been treated as a second-class citizen by their father simply because he had arrived on earth a minute later than Esau. In this moment, Jacob was willing to take matters into his own hands, ready to rewrite his own destiny. He was ready to take that one thing that made Esau special: his birthright. He took the lid off the cooking pot and allowed Esau to stare longingly at the glistening redness of the stew. Esau’s eyes lightened up at the sight of the stew, his mouth agape with ravenous craving. Jacob watched his brother’s flushed face with gusto. He felt incredibly empowered in Esau’s moment of weakness. As Jacob abruptly closed the boiling pot of stew, Esau regained his composure and said softly:

“You must let me have some of that red stew. I am famished”.

“Of course. Why not”, Jacob replied as he watched his brother motion toward the pot of stew.

“But you must first sell me your birthright”, he quickly added in a tone that hid his desperation.

A brief cloud of silence fell upon them. They both exchanged a brief glance before Esau burst out in laughter while Jacob maintained an inscrutable face. Esau did not think much of what his brother was asking for. He knew Jacob was an introspective type, but there was no way he could get the birthright as a second child. He, Esau, was by nature and by default the legitimate heir of the Abrahamic dynasty.

“I am about to die, so what good is a birthright to me?”, Esau said, tongue-in-cheek, as he moved closer to the bowl of stew.

“Swear to me first”, Jacob said, shocked by the urgency that accompanied those words that dropped from his mouth. This was the moment when Esau realized that his brother was dead serious. It now made sense to him why his brother had low-key resented him all these years. But there was no going back. His whole body called for the red stew, nothing could appease his raging appetite. In this fleeting moment, the only thing that occupied Esau’s mind was how Jacob’s red stew would land on his taste buds. The two brothers were both greedy. Jacob wanted Esau’s destiny. Esau wanted Jacob’s bowl of stew. Little did they know that that transaction would change the course of history forever. Esau swore to Jacob, he sold his birthright to him. In return, Jacob served Esau a bowl of red stew, watched him eat, drink and leave the scene.

******************************************************************************

We know the rest of the story of Jacob and Esau. We know how they both staged one of the messiest family feud in history. We know how Jacob would later trick their senescent father into blessing him instead of Esau. We know how he (Jacob) fled to Haran when he heard that Esau was plotting to kill him in retaliation. For a long time, I thought Esau was the victim of circumstance. I thought Jacob was a cheat and a manipulator (which he actually was until he had an encounter with God). I felt Esau was a typical Aristotelian tragic hero. Wasn’t it prophesied, before his birth, that he would be supplanted by his brother? Wasn’t he a predestinated loser? Now, I have come to realize that while God allows events in our lives to accomplish his overall purposes, we are still responsible for our actions. Esau chose to sell his birthright. He did not value his inheritance, he let his bright glory slide away in a fleeting moment of gratification. The author of the book of Hebrews (12:14-16) referred to Esau as an “irreverent” and a “profane” person. Also, we get to see more of Esau’s disposition to life in Genesis 27 where, to his parents’ utter dismay and disappointment, he married heathen women. Did Esau live to regret his actions? Certainly. The author of Hebrews told us that he “sought carefully with tears” the inheritance he gave in exchange for a momentary pleasure. Even today, the descendants of Esau (Edom) are fighting to get back their heritage which now belongs to the children of Jacob (Israel). It is worthy of note that Esau started out as their father’s favorite, the same way many of us are so precious in the Father’s eyes. But because of impulsiveness, self-absorption, nonchalance and lack of insight, Esau ended up as the bad egg. As children of God, we have obtained a spiritual blessing and an eternal inheritance; we are joint heirs with Christ (Ephesians 3:6). Because we belong to Christ, we are Abraham’s descendants and heirs according to promise (Galatians 3:29). But it is quite unfortunate that many will lose this eternal inheritance because they will choose not to subdue earthly gratifications. Esau is not the only one who sold his birthright, many of us are doing the same today. We allow physical satisfaction and comfort to take precedence over spiritual priorities. God has an inheritance for you, He has deposited greatness inside of you. Do not think lightly of His promises and commands. If you trade your spiritual blessings by yielding to fleshly temptations, trust me, you will one day cry for it and, by then, it might be too late. Never sell your eternal inheritance and glorious destiny for a bowl of stew.

What is prayer to begin with?

Prayer, simply put, is a deliberate communication with God. It may manifest in the form of supplication or intercession; it may even be in the form of thanksgiving or praise. Sometimes it is a form of meditation on the words, attributes and person of God. It is, overall, a performance of intimacy or fellowship with God. As Brother Charles Wesley reminds us, prayer is a Christian’s vital breath; it is a Christian pilgrim’s staff to walk with God.

Those who lived a life of prayer

One of my models when it comes to prayer is Martin Luther who once mentioned that “I have so much to do that I shall spend the first three hours in prayer.” Luther lived a prayerful life and was known to spend hours on his knees at every point of the day. John Knox is another prayer warrior on whose prayer life the Queen of Scotland commented that “I fear the prayers of John Knox more than all the assembled armies of Europe.” Also in the Bible, we have examples of those who literally prayed down miracles. Elijah’s prayer brought down fire from heaven to destroy the altars of Baal. James told us that “Elijah was a human being like us. He prayed earnestly that it would not rain, and it did not rain on the land for three and a half years” (James 5:17). Daniel also had the habit of praying three times every day. We know about Enoch who communed with God so much that he “disappeared” – that is, he did not witness death (Genesis 5:24). In essence, a life sold out to praying is the one to which the supernatural is natural.

A prayerless generation

In this age of email alerts, Facebook notifications, Twitter trends and Tik Tok’ing, how does one maintain a mind that is continually stayed on God? If we want to be honest with ourselves, we know how much hours we spend watching YouTube videos and WhatsApp statuses instead of praying. Our mobile devices are slowing down our spiritual progress. We have become slothful in the most important business: the business of prayer (Romans 12:11). I must say, though, the problem is really not in our possession of smartphones or our use of social media, the problem is with our hearts. Our hearts are far away from God. We have lost that sense of desire for God that characterized the Early Church. The truth, according to St. Augustine, is that our hearts will remain restless, until they can find rest in God. This is where the Lord’s Prayer becomes most helpful.

The Lord’s Prayer

Andrew Murray emphasizes the importance of maintaining our relationship with God through prayer; he recommends that we pray the Lord’s Prayer repeatedly throughout the day. This is so important because of the state of our easily drifting minds. One moment we are praying, the next we are thinking about that email we need to reply to. Using the structure of the Lord’s Prayer helps us to recognize when our mind has wandered and helps us remember where to pick up again. Some people may push back on this method of prayer, saying that it is too structured and therefore restrains the Spirit’s spontaneous leading. In fact, I have found the opposite to be true. As someone who has always favored unscripted prayers that express heartfelt longings and desires, I have come to realize that structure and spontaneity are not at odds with each other. Every time I pray the Lord’s Prayer, my prayers have been richer, deeper, and have unlocked affections that are otherwise concealed.

The Sin of Prayerlessness

I have come to realize that prayerlessness is a sin (1 Samuel12:23). After all, Jesus commanded that “we ought to pray for one another”. I have also realized that intercession can help us to stay in a continuous prayer mode. When you don’t know what to pray about, pray for others. There is always someone in need of your prayers. Overall, I am grateful to God for giving me a renewed sense of expectancy in prayer and an appreciation for the cross-won gift of prayer. Inasmuch as it has benefited me, I commend it to you. With that, I will end with what Martin Luther once said: “I will tell you as best I can what I do personally when I pray. May our dear Lord grant to you and to everybody to do it better than I! Amen.”

Prayer is the Soul’s Sincere Desire by Charles Wesley

1 PRAYER is the soul’s sincere desire,
Uttered or unexpressed;
The motion of a hidden fire,
That trembles in the breast.

2. Prayer is the burden of a sigh,
The falling of a tear;
The upward glancing of an eye,
When none but God is near.

3 Prayer is the simplest form of speech
That infant lips can try;
Prayer the sublimest strains that reach
The Majesty on high.

4 Prayer is the contrite sinner’s voice,
Returning from his ways;
While angels in their songs rejoice,
And cry, “Behold he prays!”

5 Prayer is the Christian’s vital breath,
The Christian’s native air;
His watchword at the gates of death;
He enters heaven with prayer.

Author: Mulalo Mapfumo

Do you often forget that God loves you unconditionally? Are you often beset with a feeling of being unloved or unlovable? Have you ever entertained the thought of being unworthy of God’s love? Well, I am happy to inform you that you are not alone. I am glad to let you know that God’s love for you is unequivocally boundless. He loves you despite of your feelings. In this blogpost, I compile a list of my go-to songs whenever I need to be reminded of God’s love for me. I should mention, however, that listening to these songs does not take away the place of prayer and the affirmation you get from reading God’s words. In fact, these songs usually lead me to the place of prayer and I hope they do the same for you. Also, the subject of love can be thought of in various ways but, for this purpose of this blogpost, I am focusing only on songs that are about being at the receiving end of God’s love. Lastly, there are usually many versions of one song but, in this blogpost, I provide a link to my favorite version of each song.

1. The Love of God by the Gaither Vocal Band

This song is a common Sunday hymn in most churches. It is always so powerful and refreshing to listen to. It reminds me that the love of God for me is measureless and indescribable – even Shakespeare would be incapable of putting it into words. One of the finest lines of the song states that “to write the love of God above would drain the ocean dry”. It also states that the love of God is the “redeeming grace to Adam’s race”. I pray that as you listen to this song, your eyes will be opened to the depth and breadth of the savior’s love for you: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NqbqjX2KRyY

2. Your Love Never Fails by Chris Quilala/Jesus Culture

There is a vulnerability in Quilala’s voice that gets to me every time. I have followed his life’s story a little bit and I can tell that he means every single word he sings. Despite its heavy instrumentals, this song reminds me that when everything else fails, God’s love remains. Even when I fail myself, God’s love stays unchanging. The first line of the song reminds me of Psalm 139:7-8: I can never run away from God’s love because His love is the kind that zealously pursues me. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IoezWBPGRAc

3. Furious by Jeremy Riddle/Bethel music

Jeremy Riddle is an anointed singer, and I appreciate the picture of God’s love that this song paints. We usually have this tender and sweet image of God’s love, but this song reminds us of the tenacious grip of God’s love over us. It states that “nothing can tear us from the grip of His mighty love”. There is nothing we have done – or can do – to undo God’s love. God’s love is sweet and tender, but also fierce and furious; it wakes many hearts to life. The fierce love of God awakens us from our loveless slumber. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KcVFdMbUztg

4. Lettered Love by Hillsong Worship

This song is very special; its words are so poetic and heartfelt. Its main point is that the Bible is God’s love letter to us. God’s Word is His lettered love that shapes the life of Bible-believing Christians. The song is a plea to God. The writer is asking God to make him/her understand what “love paid for” . The song ends with a prayer that states: “ Lord have this broken heart/ For this broken heart is paid for/ And shaped by the truth of Your Word/ This lettered love Has written my story.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yP-Pcz7OHgk

5. Good and Loved by Travis Greene and Steffany Gretzinger

I have lost count of the number of times I have listened to this song. In fact, as I type this words, the lyrics of the songs are hitting me again like thunder. On behalf of the church, the Bride of Christ, I say thank God for the gift of Travis and Steffany. This song has helped me to get through depression on countless occasions. Maybe the secret of the song is in the way Travis and Steffany impersonate the voice of God; hence the idea is to listen to the song as if God is directly speaking to you. This is what God says in the song: “There’ll be times when you’re up/ And times when you’re down/ I’m never too far/Just look around and you’ll find Me/I’m by your side, arms open wide/ I am good, you are loved”. It is that last line, “I am good, you are loved” that brings shrills to my spine all the time. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DefL-oJpjo8

6. You Say by Lauren Daigle

It’s hard to imagine this song being sung by someone else; Lauren Daigle’s mellifluous voice and smooth tone will make you break down in tears as your eyes become open to the essence of love. I am not too surprised that this song has gained so much popularity in the mainstream media. Who doesn’t desire a supernatural love? Who doesn’t fight voices in their head telling them they are not enough? Who doesn’t struggle with impostor’s syndrome? Who doesn’t sometimes feel small, betrayed and confused?  Daigle is telling you in this song that the only thing that really matters is not what the world tells you about yourself, but what God thinks of you. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sIaT8Jl2zpI

This is what God thinks and says about you:

You say I am loved when I can’t feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
And you say I am held when I am falling short
And when I don’t belong, oh You say I am Yours

• 7. How He Loves Us by Peter Mattis/Bethel Music

Have you ever imagined the feistiness of a hurricane? That’s not even close to the way God loves you. When God loves, He goes all out. He loves jealously (yes, you heard that. He is a jealous lover, Exodus 34:14). God’s jealousy is motivated by love, it is a jealousy that comes from a place of profound, lavish and illogical love. The line that gets me most in the song is the one that says: “I don’t have time to maintain these regrets when I think about the way He loves us”. Sometimes we get so caught up in our guilts and regrets that we forget that “God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us”(Romans 5:8). So, my friend, instead of dwelling too much on your fears and failures, dwell on God’s love for you. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5L4FbKbyIeA

8. Lovin’ Me by Jonathan McReynolds

I don’t know any Jonathan McReynolds’ song that is not soul-stirring. In “Lovin’ Me”, he expresses his unreserved appreciation to God for loving him despite him being so unlovable. He goes on to say that there are days when he dislikes himself but, still, God loves him. He says that “there were days I looked at myself I felt like less of a person compared to everyone else” but when God looks at him, He sees His beloved son whom He died on the cross for. The song ends with these powerful lines:

Though I know I don’t have everything that it takes You keep lovin’ me
And regardless of every mistake that I make, You keep lovin’ me
And it probably don’t matter what I do or say, You keep lovin’ me)
And even with the pimples on my face, You keep lovin’ me

Just in case you don’t know, this song inspired the famous quote: “when others are throwing shade, God’s Love will make you shine”. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mfyVeJ2OdQ

9. The Father’s Song Matt Redman

Most Christians would know Matt Redman for his hit song, “10,000 Reasons”, but I would argue that his most personal and probably heart-piercing song is “The Father’s Song”. Matt lost his biological father to suicide at the age of seven and suffered abuses from his step-father, but he never felt fatherless because God was(and still is) always there for him. God is always there for the fatherless, He is the father of the fatherless(Psalm 68:5). This song reminds us that the Father’s love is in the song He sings over us; it is His melody that makes our heart leap for joy. The Father’s love is “Heaven’s perfect mystery”. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=esapsbVXXsc

10. Your Love is Better Than Life by Newsboys

I started listening to Newsboys after seeing the movie, God’s Not Dead. “Your Love is Better Than Life” may not be my favorite of all their songs, but the song became more meaningful to me after I understood that it was inspired by Psalms 63:3. I like how the song conveys the confusion and frailties that often beset us (even) as Christians. But for the love of God, we would all be nothing but broken machines. But for the love of God, life would have been so meaningless, our daily activities would have been nothing but a mindless routine. The love of God breathes life into all we do; in fact, the love of God is better than life. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TABWI4gxdhg

11. One Thing Remains by Chris Quilala/Jesus Culture

Again, there is something magnetic, vulnerable and convincing in Quilala’s voice. I find the lyrics of this song most unforgettable. The love of God is a fountain that never runs dry; it never fails, it never runs out on us. The love of God is constant through our trials and the different seasons we go through in life. More importantly, the love of God overshadows and outpowers every mountain we may face. The love of God is the one thing that always remains. GLORY!!! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6_KXsMCJgBQ

12. Boundless Love by Ernie Haase and Signature Sound

I have been listening to the Signature Sound for over a decade now. I just enjoy their theatrics and amazing harmony. However, I have been hooked on “Boundless Love” since I heard it about seven years ago. This song has helped me out of dark seasons of lovelessness. The song reminds me that there is no friend, brother or parent who will love me the way Jesus does. Jesus loves me so much that He died for me. He proved His love for me through His death on Calvary. But that is not the end of the story. His love knows no boundaries­– it is boundless. His love knows no end, it continues to eternity – it is endless. Knowing this gives me so much consolation. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s-zwCGJggp4

13. His Love is Relentless by Hillsong Worship

I like listening to this song in the morning because it is so full of energy, the kind of energy one needs to face a challenging day. This song reminds me that God’s love for me is relentless and it is why I refuse to give up on myself. It is why I refuse to give up on life. It is the bridge of the song that I like most. It reminds me that the love of God is full of light so much that it “tears through the veil of darkness” and “breaks every chain and sets us free” from all inhibitions. The love of God is not only relentless, it is liberating. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4N9mCUsTap

14. Reckless Love by Cory Asbury

I know this song has attracted a lot of controversies because of the word “reckless”, but, in my opinion, those who criticize the song have not taken time to understand the spirit behind its composition. As Cory himself mentioned, the song is not saying that God is reckless, but the way he loves is, in many regards, quite so. If you read the story of the prodigal son carefully, you’ll understand that the love of God can indeed appear exuberant if not unrestrictedly radical. Even Jesus mentioned that the angels literally become ecstatic when a sinner repents (Luke 15:10). The love of God is illogical to the carnal mind. It is an absurdity to the scholarly mind. It is bankruptcy to the economist. But to a child of God, it is real, felt, known and experienced. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rMjQxsfLFz

15. Written in Red by David Phelps/Gaither Vocal Band

This is my last but not least love song. It comes last precisely because David Phelps is my favorite singer/vocalist (my list of favorite things changes as quickly as a chameleon’s skin, but David Phelps voice remains the primus inter pares in my head). The harmony in the chorus gives me chills every time. The lyrics are deceptively simple, yet they powerfully convey the centrality of the theme of love in the story of the cross. The song depicts how, as blood was dripping from Jesus body on the cross, God was sending the world a signal of love. So, whenever I feel unloved, I remember how Jesus sent His love in “letters of crimson”. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0WjcOSV-8v0

You probably can tell by now that I am drawn to a song’s lyrics more than anything else. I think songs with great lyrics can help us understand theology better. Maybe you would even agree that– drawing from my list –I have an eclectic taste in music. Please drop your list of songs that remind you of God’s love in the comment section, I would love to check them out.

 

When God told me to do a study about Owls, I was a bit reluctant because I wondered what lessons one could possibly learn from these predatory birds that are sometimes perceived as omens of bad luck or death. Although I’m not an Ornithologist or a Zoologist, by the time I was done with my little research, I had learnt so many positive things about these amazing creatures of God and I’ll be sharing five of these lessons I learnt in this article.

First, owls fly silently through the night. Their wing flaps are so noiseless that humans rarely recognize the sound of their flight, even at a close range. The fluffy edges of their feathers enable them to quietly clamp down on unsuspecting preys. Owls are considered the wisest of all birds and their great wisdom lies in the stillness of their silence. From the owls, I have learnt about quiet strengths. From them, I re-learnt Biblical truths about being quick to listen and slow to speak. The way they live gives a refreshing meaning to the old chestnut: “silence is golden”. In addition, I have learnt that the silent flight of owls has to do with giving. Owls silently hunt for preys such as mice, voles, rats and even small birds, so that they can share with Hawks in their territories, and Hawks, in turn, reciprocate the act of giving/kindness when they catch their own preys during the day. In the light of this, the bible admonishes us to be ‘’silent’’ about our giving and be hospitable (Hebrew 13:2). ‘‘But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you (Matt. 6: 3 -4)’’.

Second, Owls are nocturnal birds; they dine late, mate late and enjoy nightlife. Personally, I’m not nocturnal, but the truth is that the nighttime is always a good time to tarry in the place of prayer. The bible says when men slept, his enemy came and sowed tares among the wheat and went his way. We have read about so many bible figure like Jacob who wrestled all night with a man until daybreak and got a new name. We also know about Paul and Silas’ midnight prayers and songs that caused an earthquake and opened prison doors. In Luke 6:12, the bible records that our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ, prayed all night. You should take a cue from owls, and this is, perhaps, a call to wake up from your sleep, because a little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest, and poverty will come upon you like a robber, and want like an armed man.

Third, owls don’t have eyeballs that shift from side to side like many other birds. Instead, they have a pair of elongated tube eyes, fixed immovably in their skulls, in front of their face like humans. These help them to always look forward and gather more light from the moon and stars. Apostle Paul told us he focused on one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead. We must remain focused, forward-looking and visionary in life because every ‘Abraham’ will only get lands as far as they can see. More often than not, we dwell in our past. We forget that our past is past and we are not to remember the former things, nor consider the things of old. Look unto Jesus, the author and finisher of your faith and your tomorrow will be alright. Owls’ immovable eyes also help them to discern what is important to them– their prey. We must trust God for the spirit of discernment especially in this perilous time we live in.

Fourth, to compensate for their immovable eyes, owls have a neck bone that swivels up to 270° and two ear holes covered in feathers behind their flat face. One ear is higher than the other so that it can triangulate to the exact spot of any noise of its prey in the dark, no matter how far away the sound is coming from. These features aid owl hearing and direction. We know that God hears us if we ask anything according to his will but do we hear Him?The Holy Spirit is constantly speaking, but only He who has an ear can hear what the Spirit is saying to the churches. The reason many remain in a state of confusion, hopelessness and doubt is that they do not hear a word saying ‘this is the way, walk in it.’ Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of Christ. As Sheep,there is always a word per time we need to hear. Thus, we must be in tune with the radio frequency of Heaven so that we can clearly hear the voice of our Shepherd per time (John 10:27).

 Lastly, Owls are rarely rushed as they sit on their perch. While sitting and waiting, they continue to look and listen to become more aware of their environment and after taking notice of their prey, they swoop silently to grab dinner. Beloved, you have need of patience, that, after ye have done the will of God, ye might receive the promise (Heb 10:36). The vision is always for an appointed time, though it tarries, wait, it will surely come to pass. We need to learn to patiently wait on God. By so doing, our strength is renewed. Abraham waited for Isaac, Hannah waited for Samuel, Joseph waited for the fulfilment of his dreams, even Jesus waited for 30 years before starting his ministry. In the place of waiting, ideas and revelations are released. In the place of waiting, we receive victuals for life’s journey.

Author: Ottu Bodunrin

You felt on top of the world the day you surrendered your life into His care

You were sure life’s mountains and hills had been moved

Yes, the stone had been rolled away

The cloak of shame and guilt was gone

The weight of sin lifted

The truth had finally set you free

---

But not too long after,

Doubt crept in like an entitled brat

You started to drift beneath the horizon

Your rough weathers left a winter in your soul

You crawled under the yoke of secret sins

You floundered with a bucket list of unanswered prayers

You wrestled with lonely days and gloomy nights

You almost threw in the towel

You wondered if this Jesus thing was a hoax

But still,

You fought

You fought so hard for a touch of the master’s hand

“God, why have you forsaken me?” became your anthem

But then,

It dawned on you that He never promised a frictionless existence

You remembered when He said that you’d be met with trials and tribulations

It became clear to you that to be a Christian is to not have everything figured out

You now understand why “farther along you’ll understand why”

Anchor

 :an iron instrument used for holding a ship

Anchor

:a strong metallic object dropped firmly into the bottom of the sea to prevent the ship from capsizing

Anchor

:a device used to prevent a ship from swaying or moving in the case of an angry storm

Anchor

: that which gives stability and security

And then came that moment

When you realised that He did not leave you comfortless in this dreary world

It occurred to you that in your raging storm, you have an anchor

Your anchor is your hope

Your hope makes you come alive

Your anchor is Christ

Your solid rock when everything around you is shaky

Your firm foundation when the enemy threatens to remove the ground beneath your feet

Your peace in the middle of a raging storm

Now you must know,

That even when you think He has forsaken you, He is right there with you

When your heart is unsteady, He is your steady hand

He is most present when He feels most absent

“You can trust Him even when you feel slain by Him”(Job 13:15)

In the rolling surges of weakness and sickness,

Your anchor is

Christ.

Examine yourselves to see if your faith is genuine. Test yourselves….(2 Corinthians 13:5 NLT)

It is not an accident that in the very last chapter of Paul’s letter to the Corinthian church, he asked them to examine their faith and develop the habit of evaluating themselves. The whole Bible itself is full of instances where people are encouraged to examine themselves. For example, In Lamentations 3 verse 40, Jeremiah enjoined the Israelites to do a soul-searching and to test themselves. The Psalmist also in Psalms 119 verse 59 wrote about how he “thought about his own ways”. I believe Jesus also gestured to this subject of self-examination in his parable of the mote and the beam (Matthew 7:1-5). But, unfortunately, it seems we are often quick to evaluate others rather than ourselves. It is in fact a natural human instinct to look outward rather than looking inward. We are often inclined to look at the mote in others’ eyes rather than tending to the beam in our own eyes.

Paul instructed the Corinthians to check themselves to see if their faith was genuine. Sometimes, like the Corinthian church, we are so overconfident about our faith that we don’t see the need to bring its genuineness under scrutiny. I can’t help but be reminded of the Pharisees. Perhaps if they were more critical of themselves, they would have realized that God wasn’t particularly fond of their service. I really appreciate a note on 2 Corinthians 13:5 that states that “just as we get physical check-ups, Paul urges us to do spiritual check-ups too”. Even when we do not feel sick, we are advised to do medical check-ups regularly because some ailments may be asymptomatic and it is by doing check-ups that they can be discovered and treated. This is what obtains in the spiritual realm too. Sometimes we are so blind to our own shortcomings and, as a result, we miss the chance to do a honest self-reflection which could help bring those shortcomings to light.

We need a level of humility to be able to sit with our own thoughts and subject ourselves to the scrutiny of our own conscience. Jeremiah tells us that the heart of man is deceitful and that even man himself may not know what he is capable of. This is where God comes in. We need to help of the Holy Spirit to help us unearth our motivations and gauge our intentions. It takes the help of God to be able to see through our own heart and sincerely weigh in on our own behavior and motivations. The Psalmist had this understanding and it made him seek God for self-examination. Examine me, O God, and know my mind; test me, and discover my thoughts. Find out if there is any evil in me and guide me in the everlasting way (Psalm 26:2, GNT).

The truth is: God knows you more than you will ever know yourself. And, as your spiritual surgeon, he exposes your spiritual ailments through the microscope of his word. Yes, His word is His scalpel and it is so sharp that  it penetrates to the very core of your being,  where soul and spirit, bone and marrow meet. It interprets and reveals the true thoughts and secret motives of our hearts (Hebrews 4:12). Spiritual check-ups provide us with a glimpse of ourselves in the mirror of God’s word. We see our frightening nakedness, our odious reflection. But the good news is that the aim of a spiritual check-up is not to humiliate us but to help to live a better Christian life. Just as physical check-ups help us to be healthier, regular spiritual check-ups help intensify the presence and power of God in our lives.

What strikes me in Paul’s letter to the Corinthians is that he is not asking unbelievers (or spiritually unhealthy people) to do regular spiritual check-up. It is we, Christians, whom he is addressing. This again emphasizes the importance of regular checks and balances so as to see if we are still in sync with God. We need regular spiritual check-ups in order to see when we have (or have not) wandered away from God. We need to check to see any potential for heresies in our hearts. We must check and eliminate “every little leaven that leavens the whole lump” and every trace of a cancerous growth of sin. We need a regular spiritual check-up to enhance the genuineness of our faith.